Category Archives: Relationship Advice
The movies show it a lot, and perhaps you’ve seen it being done in public too. It’s called the French kiss, and we will show you how to do it correctly.
First though, the French kiss is one of the kissing styles that bring out the passionate side of couples. It’s a good gesture of romantic affection. So, if you’re reading this, chances are that you want to learn how to do it without encountering an embarrassing faux pas.
How to French Kiss Well – The First Step
It’s important to note that a soft, smooth and evenly moist mouth is an ideal environment to do this. Therefore, before springing into action, you need to ensure that your lips are not dry, because it will destruct your partner.
If your lips are always dry, you can make a few quick fixes.
(a) Drink lots of water, because this is a sign that you’re dehydrated.
(b) If you don’t have much time, run your wet tongue over your upper and lower lips, then press together.
Whether you want to kiss them the French way or not, fresh breath is required. Again, this is certainly very important because your mouth will remain open in such a kiss.
If you know that you’re about to kiss someone, take a Fresh mint gum after you brush your teeth. Also, try avoiding foods that leave bad odor on your mouth, i.e onion, ginger, milk etc.
Find A Good Moment
A good kiss is a mix of building tension and intimacy. Therefore, you should choose the right moment, i.e. when both of you are relaxed so that you can lose yourself into the experience.
There should be privacy so that people don’t interrupt your session.
Also, try and pick up clues from the other person. Whether you are kissing a girl or a boy, watch their body language keenly. For instance, you may notice they are looking at your lips, locking eyes or even sitting progressively close to you.
Look into their eyes. And if you want to announce your intention, look into their lips, then back slowly into their eyes.
Women have a tendency of looking down, then looking up at a man’s lashes with the intent of becoming a little bit flirtatious.
Smile at them
A simple smile will keep it light and fun. It also makes both parties feel safe and relaxed. However, this kind of smile should be soft and genuine. It shouldn’t be a fake one, or even an intense smile.
You can smile will lips closed, so that you don’t show your teeth. This way, your smile will look romantic and alluring.
If the time seems to be right, begin moving slowly, but not too slowly to the extend of it losing its spark.
The moment they send you signals that they are ready, don’t waste any minute. Close the gap between the two of you, facing one another (with your heads only a few inches apart).
Now, this is the moment you will prepare to angle your head into the right position no matter the type of kiss.
Just take it slow. The slow approach will bring tension & anticipation. However, it shouldn’t be too slow or two quick.
When you move in slow, they will watch you coming and react by meeting their lips with yours. Again, slow means you won’t accidentally bump your heads in case the other person suddenly changes their mind and turns away.
Tilting Heads When Kissing
If you meet without tilting heads, you will bump into each others’ nose. So, just tilt your head slightly. If you notice that they are tilting towards your direction, switch to the other.
However, this shouldn’t give you so much pressure. If you accidentally bump your noses, you’ll automatically adjust your heads into a more comfortable kissing position so that your noses don’t stand on the way.
Close Your Eyes
If you keep your eyes open, you’ll come across as dishonest or insincere. At this point, people are usually tempted to open their eyes and look at what their partners look like amid the throes of romantic passion.
Now, the danger of this is that you may lose the mood of kissing. That’s why it’s recommended that you close your eyes – it gives you the chance to live in the moment, instead of observing things at close range.
Open your eyes slowly the moment you pull apart. Remember not to present a stiff pucker, as if you’ve been kissing your grandmother. If you do this, it will bring non-romantic feelings.
Kissing Tips: How to French Kiss The Right Way
(a) You should lightly touch your lips over the other person’s. Ideally, you should use feather-light pressure on your lips, instead of diving right away into a full-blown French kiss. See image below.
Time to Test the waters
By now, you should have built a solid foundation for this type of a kiss – the French kiss. Give your partner a subtle hint about your readiness to move into the next level.
- Open your mouth a little bit wide, so that the other person feels invited to make that first tongue contact.
-The next step would be to lock your lips. i.e. your partner’s lower lip should be in-between your two lips. With the tip of your tongue, slightly lick the lower part of their lip – remember this should be quick. Do it in a smooth but swift motion that lasts for less than a second. If your partner is interested, they will reciprocate.
If your partner doesn’t respond to the above steps, simply pull away and focus on regular kissing. Give it another chance.
More images on how to kiss a woman the French style
You can also watch this YouTube video on how to kiss well – specifically the French kiss!
If you can’t figure them out, then you are probably not reading their body language. Human beings sometimes speak without even moving their lips, so you just need to know what to look for. For instance, have you ever held a conversation with a woman for long and then, all of a sudden, she crosses her arms, and then the vibe of your conversation just shifts? Perhaps you’ll start feeling a little bit defensive because you’re convinced that’s how she is feeling. But, wait, are you reading her right or just jumping into conclusion?
Truth is, if you misread people’s body language, or better still you fail to detect them, you are missing out a great deal. It is approximated that about 80% of what we say is nonverbal. This means that looks, gestures, eyebrow movement, lip twist and many more will send a strong message out there. No wonder experts have been studying the science of body language for years, and what they’ve found is enough to help you figure out what the opposite sex is saying.
The 3 Vs
We usually communicate with people verbally with words, vocally with tone and visually with body language. Think about an individual who tries to put on a good face during their trying moments. They might say they are fine yet they frown when saying it. That’s the reason why reading body language matters. In short, these parts tell the truth even when we try hiding it.
According to experts, noticing them is the trickiest part of all. Out of a thousand facial expressions we make, so many will pass by in flashes that won’t even register to us. But you can always train your eyes to catch them, even though you’ll miss out on a few.
How do you learn to read the face? Start by practicing what most poker players do. They are good at nonverbal cues, so if you watch them very closely, you’ll realize that sometimes they blink too fast while licking their lips just before they smile. When they do this, chances are that they are bluffing.
According to John Gottman, who is a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and also co-founder of Gottman institute, an individual can catch even the most fleeting facial expression, though it takes practice to get it right. He says people should watch the mouth, because that’s where most of the nonverbal cues on the face comes from.
For instance, should a waitress twitch her lips to one side when you order a cheap drink as opposed to an expensive one, it’s a sign that they know they’ll be getting very small tip from you. Or let’s say you gave a girlfriend some gift and they didn’t like it, they’ll attempt to smile with their lips being the only feature on their face moving.
Now, if it were a genuine smile, her cheeks would lift, her eyes would lighten up and their general facial expression would show how happy they are.
And when you take the example of wide eyes, they may say something to do with fear or surprise. But the mouth is what will tell the difference. The mouth will drop open when one is surprised, and pull back when the same person is scared.
How the body responds to facial cues
When the face communicates, the body will also respond in mysterious ways. For example, the feet are the most loyal and honest part of the body when it comes to communicating. For instance, when someone’s feet is pointed towards you, it’s a sign that they are enjoying your company. However, if the feet is turned away from you, then it’s a clear sign that their mind is somewhere else.
Again, when it comes to the body and how it communicates, not all signs may mean what you think. For example, we’ve been told for years that when someone crosses their arms, it’s a sign of being defensive. But how about when their arms are lightly crossed on their chest, instead of being tightly locked? They may simply do this because they don’t know what to do with their arms, or they are trying to give themselves a hug.
Sending the right message
It’s a known fact that ladies will try to fine-tune their movement in order to attract men they are interested in. However, it’s also important to note that behavioral patterns associated with personality or temperament are at least 50% genetically influenced. For instance, if someone is naturally high strung, getting their body to calm down might be a little bit tricky. The best thing is that people can always learn how to use nonverbal cues even if this is their nature.
It’s also true that women have mastered this art of communicating with their body language. You might see a woman seated somewhere in a corner, say at a local pub. When you happen to catch them looking at you, they may be thinking about something which concerns you. So you must watch a second and probably a third time to be sure that they want you near them. If this is the case and you pretend not to be aware of their presence, they’ll fine-tune their body even better hoping that you’ll read the signs correctly. So if you’re not careful, you might just miss out on the opportunity to strike a conversation with them.
Bottom line is this
There are so many ways in which people express their nonverbal cues to others. But it takes practice to pick up the signs and know what they are saying. People use this form of communication because they are not confident enough to say it using their mouth. So they just hope that you’ll make out whatever they are saying. Again a little more practice can help you understand their language.